During lazy summer days at the pool, did your son call out, “Watch this, Mom!” right before he landed a tidal wave of a cannonball? In the waning twilight, did your daughter shout, “Look, Dad!” right before she turned a perfect cartwheel in the grass? Maybe your son begged you to see him in the school play or your daughter pleaded with you to attend her basketball game. They needed you to see them, watch them, pay attention to them.

Even when our kids are grown, they still need us to notice them. They may not need us to watch them every minute like when they crawled through the house wreaking havoc on every item in their one-year-old reach or witness every achievement like when they were in school. But they still want us to recognize their personhood and witness their transition into amazing adults.

Here are 10 things your adult children hope you will see in them. Your son or daughter asks you to.